...how to hook up the interwebs - ghetto style.

Step one: Get a piece of shit router that's older than your laptop. Note, laptop must be running shitty Windows Vista.

Step two: String DSL line across dining room, right in the path of traffic, and over washing machine.

Step three: Affix DSL modem in place on stairway with blue painter's tape. Then run ethernet cable and power cord up through the railing.  Note - the tape must be blue to achieve maximum ghetto-ness.

Step four: Run cords across hallway and into room to hardwire laptop. Safety tip - Make sure to put a rug down to avoid tripping over wires. (For extra ghetto-ness, use a rug that completely clashes with the carpet or decor.)

Well, there you have it folks. Four easy steps to geting your very own ghetto interwebs connection.